Discipline is an important element of parenting, and it’s one that causes a lot of disagreements. I think parents would agree more on political and religious disagreements faster on discipline tactics. This article is not about the tactics, but instead the importance of making your discipline work better. These four aspects come from the book Revolutionary Parenting by George Barna 1
First, the all children need to be disciplined.
Children are not born with all the knowledge in the world. You want to make sure, they know the rules of the home, good values in life, and making positive choices. Discipline helps keep children on the right path in life. It is important to correct behavior in a healthy and mature way. I wish you only needed to discipline your child once, and they change their behavior forever. Unfortunately, that doesn’t work, which makes disciplining an everyday activity.
Second, the discipline received must be consistent in content and in response to the conditions in which it is provided.
All the adults in the home need to be on the same page for disciplining. One can’t put their kid in a time-out while the other spanks. It needs to be the same, and if one adult is not comfortable with the other methods, you need to come to a healthy and mature conclusion. The more consistent, the reasoning for punishment and the punishments needed to correct the behavior, the better chance your child has on learning to correct the behavior.
Third, the nature of the discipline must fit within the family’s culture and values.
Every family has different cultures and values, and sometimes each side of the family has differences in both areas. It is necessary for you to find the right method of discipline, as long as its lawful. There are plenty of tactics out there, and they all work depending on the parent. For example, I am pacifists and high on education, for me to discipline with spanking makes no sense. Instead, I find ways to call my child and explain later. Does it work? Yes, for me it works, but it might not work for you. Parenting isn’t a science, its all theories, so results vary.
Fourth, is that the discipline each child receives must be right for that child while still being fair to the other children in the household.
Every child is different. My two children vary in their behaviors. Taking something away from one, doesn’t have the same effect on the other. Each child needs to be disciplined and shown love afterwards differently.
When discipline is consistent, constant, matches the family culture and values, and fits your child’s personality, the better chance you are giving your child to grow on the right path.
- Barna, George (2010-09-01). Revolutionary Parenting: Raising Your Kids to Become Spiritual Champions (Kindle Locations 1129-1133). Tyndale House Publishers. Kindle Edition. ↩