This month, my wife’s grandparents will be celebrating sixty years of marriage?!
That is a crazy amount of time to think. This year I will be turning thirty-three and will be married for twelve years, so to think of sixty in any form is a long time.
How has this marriage survived sixty years? Is their marriage perfect?
No, it’s not perfect.
But, its long-standing. A long-standing marriage is something I want in my marriage.
Long-standing marriages feel like they are far and few between, in the past they were common because of society’s view of divorce. But, since divorce is a more of a social norm today, decade marriages are less common. To make a long-standing marriage today, it takes two people committed in working together to create and cultivate love especially in passion and intimacy.
How does one create and cultivate love?
In general, there is not one solution that is going to work for everyone. There is no way, for me to know what is best for every marriage to keep it strong. I can offer general advice for all couples, which is the importance of understanding your spouses love language.
What is a love language? Love languages comes from a book by Gary Chapman in which he claims that every person experiences love in five different ways.1 Having a concept of what makes your spouse to feel unique, is a great way to start creating and cultivating a long-standing love in your marriage. If your spouse’s love language is physical touch, then when your are on a date, hold their hand as much as possible. If their language is time, find ways to add more time in together in your schedule.
Marriage isn’t hard, but it takes consistent work. The more consistent work involved, the more passion and intimacy there will be in your relationship. And if those two aspects of love continue, so will your marriage for decades to come.
You can find your love language by The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lastsor you can do a simple test here ↩